Finally hit the 200's...again

While I'm super excited that I have accomplished this, I can't help feeling some how jaded. I've done this before. In fact, my lowest was 269. It seems like such a long way to go from here. What I really want is my body to remember where it was and just melt the pounds away. Perhaps that will happen, I don't know. I am trying to get my confidence back. I want to say I look good and actually believe it. 269, ready or not, here I come.

I made it through!

It was a struggle, but I made it through the Holidays! My weight fluctuated, mainly because of fluid retention from eating off program. However now I am 301 and feeling great! I can't wait to be back under the 3's.

I was looking at a Jennifer Hudson's commercial for Weight Watchers today. A tiny pang of jealousy crept in, but I pushed it away. I will never be a size 6. I know this. If I was, I'd look like a bobble head. I just want to be healthy. I have to stop comparing myself to other people, and just focus on my weight loss journey. Here goes...

Looking past Thanksgiving

Thanksgiving this year began on a positive note. I had a plan, and I had planned to stick with it. Then the feeders appeared. You know who they are. They are the ones who can't understand why or how you will have the willpower to pass up the mac and cheese, casseroles, and mashed potatoes. They can be dangerous. I caved. However I only had one plate, and I stayed away from the mashed potatoes and gravy, measured out my turkey, and overall just felt good. Yeah I gained a pound, but I made sure that I worked out really hard, and I continue to lose weight.
I realized something, running feels good. Really, really good. Granted I can only run for about 1 minute at a time, at least I'm running! LOL

Joined GHFC

Yay! I am now a member of Gainesville Health and Fitness! I'm pretty excited about this. My friends, Pam and Alex have memberships also, so we can all be work out buddies. This will be awesome motivation for me. I am so excited, I'm going to try to work out Thanksgiving day. I have to get this weight loss thing in check again. I was reflecting...my lowest was 269, so I know I can get there again. I am, as of this morning, 311. Yes that's a 42lb difference, but I can do it and more. My short term goal is to be under 300 by Dec. 17th. I can do it. I have to.

An apology...

I'd like to apologize for my previous post concerning thanksgiving day. I was wrong to admit defeat. By saying that I "know I'll be eating" this and that, I should have said that I will do my best. The fact is I'm nervous about the holidays. I'm nervous I won't exert enough willpower to adhere to the plan. I'm nervous that things will look and smell so good I won't be able to resist. I will continue take things one day at a time, but plan a day ahead for what I will eat. I think having a plan in place will help a whole lot. Here's hoping.

A moment of Clarity

I woke up this morning and thought, "Wait a minute! How the heck am I joining the MRC when the holidays are upon us?!" That's like a sabotage waiting to happen! Then I took a deep breath and realized that even if I go off program for one day, I know how to limit myself, and I know how to get back on the wagon. I can't beat myself up, and be unrealistic. I know me. I know I will have, and enjoy some turkey with gravy, mashed potatoes, mac and cheese, rolls, greens, cabbage...etc. I'm even making some apple pie cupcakes. Having said that, I will NOT be eating more than one plate of food, and if I can't fit it on my plate, I'm not gonna be able to eat it. Bottom line, no compromising. I can do this! I know because I've done it before. I will never again be that 387lb person. NEVER again! :)

I'm back!

Yes, yes y'all! I'm so excited to be joining the MRC again. I'm going in on Friday to re-join. Let's catch up...Last time I posted (earlier this year) I was newly pregnant. Well we had a boy! Darren Jadon is his name and he is perfect! He was born September 27th and weighed 7 lbs 6 oz. and 19 inches long. I have to be honest; While I'm glad to have my body back to work with, I will miss DJ's kicks and rolls. You know what else I'll miss? Eating whatever I wanted! *sigh* Alas, all good things must come to an end. I am thankful to God, however, that I didn't gain ALL my weight back. I am currently about 324. I can work with that. I typically lose over 20 lbs a month on the plan, so that will be exciting to see the 200's again. It's going to be hard work, but I'm ready! Immediate goal, lose enough inches to button my jeans again comfortably. Long term goal, continue to feel confident and sexy!